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They say: “Love conquers all. Love is a many splendored thing. Love comes from the most unexpected places. Some say “love is blind”. Some say “love is not blind, but it is actually an extra eye”. So, is love blind or not? Some say "love is in your eyes," or "love is in the air," "love me tender, love me sweet." The apostle Paul said "love is the greatest!"
They say that when a man and a woman are in love, the world around them stops revolving. Today, we are going to talk about love and romance from the context of married couples. So what if you are not married? Will this message be interesting for you? I call you stake holders. Yes, you may not be married but I am sure you know somebody who is married --your parents, your brother or sister, your son or daughter, your friends could be married. Even if you are single now, you may eventually get married.
So each one of us, whether married or not, should be interested in this message. If your parents who are married, or your friends or loved ones who are married are not doing what they are supposed to be doing as couples, I am pretty sure you’ll be affected one way or the other. That’s why we are all stakeholders in this message.
Since the book Song of Songs is not commonly preached or it’s not even a common Bible study material for us in general, allow me to share with you some background about this book. The purpose is not to overwhelm you with information but instead it sets the tone and provides a much clearer picture of the culture, the people, the events that took place when the book was written. When I read an Old Testament book, usually I look for two things. First, how the OT story points out to our Lord Jesus Christ, and Second, in what sense can this Old Testament story apply to my life today.
Background:
Song of Songs is inspired by the Holy Spirit, being part of the Bible and it is as Biblical as John 3:16 or Malachi 3:10. And since our God is the God of love and of relationships, I believe He has a special purpose why this book became part of the Bible that we have today. It shows us how important and how dignified romance and love and human sexuality is and how it can be a pure, wholesome beautiful experience if taken within the context of marriage.
Solomon was identified in the book as the bridegroom or the lover
The name of the woman was not mentioned but the book says she was a Shulamite woman. She was identified as the bride or beloved.
The book Song of Songs is also being interpreted allegorically between God and His love for His people.
On the other hand it also talks about marriage and its traditions. In the olden days, marriage are usually arranged by the parents and sometimes the couple haven’t met each other until the day they will officially become engaged.
Beloved (Woman)
2 Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth— for your love is more delightful than wine.
3 Pleasing is the fragrance of your perfumes; your name is like perfume poured out. No wonder the young women love you!
4 Take me away with you—let us hurry! Let the king bring me into his chambers.
Lover (Man)
10 How delightful is your love, my sister, my bride! How much more pleasing is your love than wine, and the fragrance of your perfume than any spice
11 Your lips drop sweetness as the honeycomb, my bride, milk and honey are under your tongue. The fragrance of your garments is like that of Lebanon
Sister during that time means “beloved” – so don’t think there was some form of an incestuous relationship here.
Life Lessons:
#1. TRUE LOVE DELIGHTS
To delight means to have great enjoyment and pleasure with the company of your partner. Remember it was much easier when there’s just the two of you. However, it’s a challenge when you start to have children.
Children, you have to give privacy to your parents sometimes.
Wives, should remember that you are wives first before being mothers.
Sometimes you will hear couples saying after several years of marriage we’re just like siblings…the spark is gone, the romance fades away! Well you have to do something about it… you’re not siblings… you’re couples.
Beloved (Woman)
1:16 How handsome you are, my lover, Oh how charming! And our bed is verdant. 2:3 Like an apple tree among the trees of the forest is my lover among the young men. I delight to sit in his shade and his fruit is sweet to my taste. He has taken me to the banquet hall and his banner over me is love.
Verdant means it’s lush.. luxurious.. The writer uses an allegory here comparing the marriage bed to a field.
Lover (Man)
1 How beautiful you are, my darling, Oh, how beautiful!
Your eyes behind your veil are doves. Your hair is like a flock of goats
descending from the hills of Gilead. 9 I liken you darling to a mare harnessed to one of the chariots of Pharaoh. 10 Your cheeks are beautiful with earrings, your neck with strings of jewels.
#2. TRUE LOVE ADMIRES
Well at least during those times, it’s a compliment to be compared to a horse. A mare is like a stallion, a thoroughbred.
Couples should not stop being attracted to each other. It makes me wonder why the problem for most couples is infidelity. We are weak (especially men) when it comes to physical attraction. I am not trying to justify anything here but sometimes, the wife is also somehow part of the problem. Couples stop being attractive. They became too familiar with each other. Sometimes, the wife will work so hard during the day –- all those household chores like cooking, doing the laundry, taking care of the children, cleaning the house…or sometimes she goes to work and at the end of the day, when the husband sees her… she looks like a character from a horror movie already… so sometimes, the wife's sacrifice during the day is not very well appreciated just because of how she looks at the end of the day.
"the man says “Like a lily among thorns is my darling among the maidens.“
Beauty is important… I did not say "being pretty." God is the God of beauty. We have to continuously admire each other and we have to try our best to always look attractive for our spouse.
"Your cheeks are beautiful with earrings, your neck with strings of jewels. We will make you earrings of gold, studded with silver."
Earrings are supposed to make a woman's cheeks beautiful. Earrings are not supposed to cover her cheeks! Sometimes, husbands cannot see their face any more because of their big earrings.
The Bible says: May your fountain be blessed, and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth!
#3. TRUE LOVE ENCOURAGES
In Chapter 1:17 the man said “The beams of our house are cedars; our rafters are firs.
The cedar of Lebanon was one of the strongest and most expensive kind of wood during those times. Men likes stability. Men looks at himself as handsome if he can well provide for his family. Couples, especially wives, encourage your spouses. Show respect to them at all times. It doesn’t matter who has the bigger salary, it doesn’t matter if you have stronger personality, it doesn’t matter if you are the one who petitioned your spouse to Canada... Show respect to him especially in front of your kids or with other people. Sometimes it’s so sad to see couples, who do not show respect to each other.
If you keep on doing that, your spouse will lose his self respect and people will not respect both of you.
If you don’t respect your spouse, who else will?
The Bible says in Proverbs 25:11 A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver.
#4. TRUE LOVE WAITS
These verses refers to physical intimacy between her and the man. She does not want any intimacy until the situation is appropriate, i.e. until they get married. Sexual relations is always viewed in the Bible within the context of marriage. Listen to this:
Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires. (2:7)
You are a garden locked up, my sister, my bride; you are a spring enclosed, a sealed fountain (4:12)
These allegories refer to virginity – a locked up garden, a spring enclosed, a sealed fountain..
There is always a time for everything. The Bible says “There is a time to embrace and a time to refrain…”
#5. TRUE LOVE CENTERS ON CHRIST
God is the originator of marriage. He invented it. As way back during creation, He already had a blue print as to how a marriage should work. Jesus Christ said,
I am the vine, you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.
Marriage is a covenant. Not only between the man and the woman - it's a 3-party covenant between the husband, the wife and God. This marriage triangle shows us that the more we get closer to God, the more we get closer to each other. There is no way our marriage should work if Christ is not at the center.
Concluding Thoughts:
Marriage is so important that Christ compared Himself to a bridegroom who loves His bride and is willing to die for His bride.
The Apostle Paul wrote to the Ephesians “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” He also said “Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church.” In both cases, Paul compares our relationship with each other as couples with our relationship with the Lord.
John 15:13 says “There is no greater love than to lay down one's life for one's friends.” Jesus calls us friends if we reciprocate His love for us by accepting Him in our lives.
The Bible tells us that one day, Christ, the bridegroom will reunite with His bride and there will be this great marriage banquet in heaven and Christ and His bride, His true love… the church, will be together … for eternity.
So each one of us, whether married or not, should be interested in this message. If your parents who are married, or your friends or loved ones who are married are not doing what they are supposed to be doing as couples, I am pretty sure you’ll be affected one way or the other. That’s why we are all stakeholders in this message.
Since the book Song of Songs is not commonly preached or it’s not even a common Bible study material for us in general, allow me to share with you some background about this book. The purpose is not to overwhelm you with information but instead it sets the tone and provides a much clearer picture of the culture, the people, the events that took place when the book was written. When I read an Old Testament book, usually I look for two things. First, how the OT story points out to our Lord Jesus Christ, and Second, in what sense can this Old Testament story apply to my life today.
Background:
- Solomon is believed to have written this book around 960 B.C.
- Solomon wrote 1,005 songs (see 1 Kings 4:32)
- This book, Song of Songs in Hebrew is Shir ha-shirim” which literally means “song of songs”
- This book is also part of the five books being read publicly during annual Jewish feasts and for Song of Songs in particular, it’s being read during Passover.
- The book uses allegories or symbolisms
- The Bible says Solomon had 700 wives and 300 concubines. I read about a Sunday school teacher who asked a young boy about Solomon, he said Solomon had 300 wives and 700 porcupines. Scholars believe that the woman in this book could be Solomon’s first wife during his younger days as a king.
Song of Songs is inspired by the Holy Spirit, being part of the Bible and it is as Biblical as John 3:16 or Malachi 3:10. And since our God is the God of love and of relationships, I believe He has a special purpose why this book became part of the Bible that we have today. It shows us how important and how dignified romance and love and human sexuality is and how it can be a pure, wholesome beautiful experience if taken within the context of marriage.
Solomon was identified in the book as the bridegroom or the lover
The name of the woman was not mentioned but the book says she was a Shulamite woman. She was identified as the bride or beloved.
The book Song of Songs is also being interpreted allegorically between God and His love for His people.
On the other hand it also talks about marriage and its traditions. In the olden days, marriage are usually arranged by the parents and sometimes the couple haven’t met each other until the day they will officially become engaged.
Beloved (Woman)
2 Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth— for your love is more delightful than wine.
3 Pleasing is the fragrance of your perfumes; your name is like perfume poured out. No wonder the young women love you!
4 Take me away with you—let us hurry! Let the king bring me into his chambers.
Lover (Man)
10 How delightful is your love, my sister, my bride! How much more pleasing is your love than wine, and the fragrance of your perfume than any spice
11 Your lips drop sweetness as the honeycomb, my bride, milk and honey are under your tongue. The fragrance of your garments is like that of Lebanon
Sister during that time means “beloved” – so don’t think there was some form of an incestuous relationship here.
Life Lessons:
#1. TRUE LOVE DELIGHTS
To delight means to have great enjoyment and pleasure with the company of your partner. Remember it was much easier when there’s just the two of you. However, it’s a challenge when you start to have children.
Children, you have to give privacy to your parents sometimes.
Wives, should remember that you are wives first before being mothers.
Sometimes you will hear couples saying after several years of marriage we’re just like siblings…the spark is gone, the romance fades away! Well you have to do something about it… you’re not siblings… you’re couples.
Beloved (Woman)
1:16 How handsome you are, my lover, Oh how charming! And our bed is verdant. 2:3 Like an apple tree among the trees of the forest is my lover among the young men. I delight to sit in his shade and his fruit is sweet to my taste. He has taken me to the banquet hall and his banner over me is love.
Verdant means it’s lush.. luxurious.. The writer uses an allegory here comparing the marriage bed to a field.
Lover (Man)
1 How beautiful you are, my darling, Oh, how beautiful!
Your eyes behind your veil are doves. Your hair is like a flock of goats
descending from the hills of Gilead. 9 I liken you darling to a mare harnessed to one of the chariots of Pharaoh. 10 Your cheeks are beautiful with earrings, your neck with strings of jewels.
#2. TRUE LOVE ADMIRES
Well at least during those times, it’s a compliment to be compared to a horse. A mare is like a stallion, a thoroughbred.
Couples should not stop being attracted to each other. It makes me wonder why the problem for most couples is infidelity. We are weak (especially men) when it comes to physical attraction. I am not trying to justify anything here but sometimes, the wife is also somehow part of the problem. Couples stop being attractive. They became too familiar with each other. Sometimes, the wife will work so hard during the day –- all those household chores like cooking, doing the laundry, taking care of the children, cleaning the house…or sometimes she goes to work and at the end of the day, when the husband sees her… she looks like a character from a horror movie already… so sometimes, the wife's sacrifice during the day is not very well appreciated just because of how she looks at the end of the day.
"the man says “Like a lily among thorns is my darling among the maidens.“
Beauty is important… I did not say "being pretty." God is the God of beauty. We have to continuously admire each other and we have to try our best to always look attractive for our spouse.
"Your cheeks are beautiful with earrings, your neck with strings of jewels. We will make you earrings of gold, studded with silver."
Earrings are supposed to make a woman's cheeks beautiful. Earrings are not supposed to cover her cheeks! Sometimes, husbands cannot see their face any more because of their big earrings.
The Bible says: May your fountain be blessed, and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth!
Do we still admire our spouse?
Are we excited to see them when we come home from work?
When you are at the mall for example, are you proud being with your spouse, do you hold her hands? or your eyes wander around?
#3. TRUE LOVE ENCOURAGES
In Chapter 1:17 the man said “The beams of our house are cedars; our rafters are firs.
The cedar of Lebanon was one of the strongest and most expensive kind of wood during those times. Men likes stability. Men looks at himself as handsome if he can well provide for his family. Couples, especially wives, encourage your spouses. Show respect to them at all times. It doesn’t matter who has the bigger salary, it doesn’t matter if you have stronger personality, it doesn’t matter if you are the one who petitioned your spouse to Canada... Show respect to him especially in front of your kids or with other people. Sometimes it’s so sad to see couples, who do not show respect to each other.
If you keep on doing that, your spouse will lose his self respect and people will not respect both of you.
If you don’t respect your spouse, who else will?
The Bible says in Proverbs 25:11 A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver.
#4. TRUE LOVE WAITS
These verses refers to physical intimacy between her and the man. She does not want any intimacy until the situation is appropriate, i.e. until they get married. Sexual relations is always viewed in the Bible within the context of marriage. Listen to this:
Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires. (2:7)
You are a garden locked up, my sister, my bride; you are a spring enclosed, a sealed fountain (4:12)
These allegories refer to virginity – a locked up garden, a spring enclosed, a sealed fountain..
There is always a time for everything. The Bible says “There is a time to embrace and a time to refrain…”
#5. TRUE LOVE CENTERS ON CHRIST
God is the originator of marriage. He invented it. As way back during creation, He already had a blue print as to how a marriage should work. Jesus Christ said,
I am the vine, you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.
Marriage is a covenant. Not only between the man and the woman - it's a 3-party covenant between the husband, the wife and God. This marriage triangle shows us that the more we get closer to God, the more we get closer to each other. There is no way our marriage should work if Christ is not at the center.
Concluding Thoughts:
- Every marriage is a picture of God’s covenant with His church.
Marriage is so important that Christ compared Himself to a bridegroom who loves His bride and is willing to die for His bride.
The Apostle Paul wrote to the Ephesians “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” He also said “Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church.” In both cases, Paul compares our relationship with each other as couples with our relationship with the Lord.
- Jesus Christ expressed His TRUE LOVE for each one of us by dying on the cross.
John 15:13 says “There is no greater love than to lay down one's life for one's friends.” Jesus calls us friends if we reciprocate His love for us by accepting Him in our lives.
The Bible tells us that one day, Christ, the bridegroom will reunite with His bride and there will be this great marriage banquet in heaven and Christ and His bride, His true love… the church, will be together … for eternity.
Prayer
Wherever you are, whatever you situation you may be -- you need the love of Jesus in your life.
Please say this prayer sincerely from your heart:
Father God, I confess all my sins to you today. Please forgive me. Today, I open my heart to your Son Jesus Christ. I accept Him in my life as my Savior and as my Lord. May the Holy Spirit come to my life and make me the kind of person you want me to be. In Jesus Name, I pray. Amen.Please say this prayer sincerely from your heart:
The above article is an excerpt from a sermon delivered at WCF Richmond on February 15, 2015
I apologize if there are grammatical and spelling errors.
If you are looking for a church in British Columbia, Canada please visit our website at:
www.wordchristianfellowship.com
www.wordchristianfellowship.com
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